Finger-pointing exercises

If mental excercise could be transferred to physical, I think I would have dropped ten pounds in the last 48 hours.  After an extremely long day at school yesterday, I came home and grabbed the TV remote, searching in vain for some relaxation.  I’m a very political person, so I felt I “should” watch Barack Obama’s speech as it played, but politics was just too depressing for me.  I didn’t think there’d be a day when Optimist-Obama could be labelled “depressing”, but I was wrong.  So I watched several episodes of 7th Heaven, instead.  It felt so good to laugh!  After that I went and added Tom Petty’s “Won’t Back Down” into my playlist to listen to.  I feel very refreshed now!

So, what happened?  I have just listened to as much religious, air-headed, pompous gossip as one girl can take.  I sat listening to my friends, trying hard not to explode in rage and realized how badly I wanted to get away, to flee!  I played the Devil’s Advocate to everything they said.  So-and-so’s family has really back-slid in their faith.  I asked how.  I mean, if you’re going to throw out such harsh accusations, you better have some dang good reasoning behind it.  It’s not that I don’t think it can happen; I do.  But why are we talking about it?  If you want to do something about that, and truly feel for this family, PRAY.  Don’t gossip!!!

Earlier, I’d found that they don’t like certain people in our school.  “Really?!”  I replied in shock.  “I didn’t know you felt that way.  I really like them; I find them very friendly.”

“Ya, but is it real friendliness?”  was what I got in reply.

“Probably not,” I answered. “But I could say that about 3/4 of the entire world.” 

I myself need to work on being more sincere and congruent.  After all, wouldn’t a sincere person have given my gossipy friends a piece of my mind (in a nice way)?  I could say the same thing about my judgmental friends. 

And let’s not get into the hypocrisy here.  It’s insane.  You post-High School people are very lucky. 

One 7th Heaven episode really touched me here.  They basically said that we need to realize that, despite people having difference, we all have similarities.  Let’s focus on the things we have in common.  Like love.  The desire to be in a relationship, to have someone who cares, to know you matter.   

But that’s not me.  I want to dwell on differences.  I want a new group of friends.  I want to get away from High School.  I confess that part of me wants to stay mad at them.  I think it’s because then I feel somehow superior.  The whole “righteous anger” thing.  Purely pathetic.

That’s when God gives me a shake and reminds me of certain things.  Like two years ago.  I gossiped with a couple of old friends for hours and days and months about one single lady because of something she did to us.  And nothing I have ever heard my friends say in their petty, childish opinions, or their actual spiritual concern has come close to the nasty things I said about her.  I was cruel, I was mean.  I hated her guts.  I still don’t like her.  She’s a Christian, and think I’d be willing to go to hell just so I won’t have to spend eternity with her!! (Ok, so that’s a little bit of an exageration.)  But I was really mad.  And really wrong to say the things I did.

It’s not a good realization.

Who am I to judge when I am more guilty?


2 Responses

  1. Great post, but 7th Heaven? That’s got to be one of the worst shows ever!

  2. Haha, I know Kip. You and most of my friends are all in agreement. I am very old-fashioned when it comes to television. I also do the Little House on the Prairie, Full House, and Growing Pains thing, too. I’m an oldy-junkie. 🙂 I like them because they’re old fashioned and sweet. Not really realistic, but they make you wish the world really was that uncomplicated! 🙂

    I’m glad you like the post, tho. 🙂

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